


Fire In Jotunheim

by potatowrites



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: And Bifrost works differently I guess?, Freely interpreted Norse Myth thrown into mix, Jotunn Loki (Marvel), Literal Sleeping Together, Mild Blood, Sharing Body Heat, Sharing a Bath, Teenage Sif, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, Threats of Violence, Where Odin didn't pick up baby Loki, alternative universe, bathing together, teenage loki
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-19
Updated: 2018-05-25
Packaged: 2019-05-09 02:39:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 18,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14707553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/potatowrites/pseuds/potatowrites
Summary: Young Sif ends up in Jotunheim, and makes an unexpected ally.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Previously published in my Tumblr. AO3 version is better edited and is complete.

**CHAPTER 1**

King Laufey sat on his throne. In the ruins of his frozen palace he had moulded himself into his seat of ice, becoming part of it. He was a statue of ice cold flesh, feeling nothing but letting his mind wander in the realms of sleep. There was very little left for him to rule, and these days it was his son who dealt with the mundane needs of the Jotun.  
It had been a long time since Laufey had been brought back from his dreams. He resisted the pull of waking world. Then the voices reached him and through his sleep he heard a word: Asgardian. Laufey's eyes opened, and the clamour that had waken him ended.

Before the throne was a hunting group of Jotun men, circled around an Asgardian warrior. A woman. Laufey turned his head slightly. How long had he slept?

"Helblindi, what is this?" Laufey spoke, his voice deep after the long silence.

Laufey's son stepped before the throne. "Father, I'm surprised to see you awake! My hunters found an Asgardian spy and brought her to me. Your awakening is well timed." Helblindi was quick to recover from the surprise and gave a gesture as if presenting the prisoner to Laufey. King gave this his silent approval. His son had grown to a man fit to rule in his absence. He was big and strong, black furs tied on his loins and shoulders, wearing a necklace made of bear teeth.

Laufey turned his attention to the Asgardian. The red-clad woman with dark curls was bound in ice shackles and stripped from her weapons, but she was still fighting to break away. Her vicious kicks kept the hunters at bay, them holding her at distance by spears. Laufey also observed her kicks were starting to slow, not reaching as high as when she started. The hunters let her fight for a bit more and tire herself out.

There was a slight motion on the side of Laufey's throne. A presence was there, one he knew, but did not care for. He would deal with the Asgardian first.

"Daughter of Asgard!" Laufey's words stopped the woman. She spun around to meet the king's gaze.

"I am Lady Sif of Asgard, King Laufey. I demand my release and safe passage back!" her voice rang clear and proud.

"You demand?" Laufey answered softly. "You are not in the position to make demands. You are in Jotunheim breaking the treaty between our realms."

"Not on purpose. Me being here is purely by accident. I'll take my leave as soon as you allow it... your highness." Lady Sif didn't seem to lose a bit of her spirit, but she chose her words more carefully now.

"By accident? Tell me more, and I'll see if you are to be believed." Laufey leaned slightly forward on his throne as to hear her words better. Lady Sif glanced around her and licked her lips. She was uncertain, but then straightened herself and looked straight at Laufey.

"I heard of a strange cave in Asgard, with snow and cold inside it even in the hottest midsummers day. I went to explore it, fell on ice and after a long fall I found myself here. Then your hunters found me."

"A passageway between our realms? Should you not die instead of revealing such an advantage point to me?" Laufey inquired. "You should craft better lies, Lady Sif."

"I do not lie!" Her voice rang with fury. She seemed more upset from having her honour questioned than facing death. "The passage was one way. I tried to crawl back but the ice was solid as rock. It's useless to you."

"If what you say is true, how do I know if more Asgardians aren't planning to sneak into Jotunheim as we speak? Are you not only a vanguard of an attack?" Laufey pressed on. The presence on his side moved again, as to interfere but with slightest gesture Laufey ordered stillness, not turning his attention away from the woman. "Why haven't you called your gatekeeper to pull you to safety, if you are not here by design?"

"No other Asgardian is coming. I set to search the cave on my own, and told no one of it. And after I found the passageway closed, I called for Heimdall. He didn't hear me."

Laufey had an idea why so. The passageway had pulled her from her own realm, cutting her of from it. The gatekeeper would not find her, if he didn't know exactly where to look.

"So, your defence is that you came here by accident, and you swear you are not followed, nor does anyone know you are here?" Laufey questioned the Asgardian.

Her eyes were stern and voice clear as she answered: "Yes, I swear so!" But a smile spread on Laufey's lips and the realisation of her mistake came apparent of her face.

"Lady Sif of Asgard, no one is coming to your aid. You have fallen to my hands, helpless and bound. Look around you, at the remains of my palace and realm, and try to think of a reason I'd have any mercy on you. If you can, I'll give you a quick death."

Asgardian stood still, the steam of her breath freezing on her curls. Her eyes became steel as she looked on Laufey, sneering. "I don't want a thing from you. Set your men on me, and I'll die a warriors death. They won't take me alive again."

Laufey was about to give the order when there was a voice speaking to him. "Father." It was too quiet to anyone else hear, and only slightly he turned towards it, listening.

"Give her death and it'll be an empty revenge. She's only glad to die. What will be left for you? Dead body of a girl."

Laufey haven't taken his eyes off the Asgardian, and as he examined her closer he realised that she was indeed still very young. Her fierceness had made her seem older, but she was hardly an adult yet. Killing a child didn't bother Laufey. But he admitted there was little satisfaction in that. Only if he could parade her mutilated body in front of her parents and her king, but that would mean war. One he would not win. He stayed still and listened.

"Humiliate her, let her live and be diminished, and you'll see her suffer. Her broken crying will satisfy you more than her defiant battle cry." The last words were a breathy whisper. "I know everything about humiliation. Give her to me."

Laufey sat still. Helblindi was looking at him, waiting for his signal. He wanted to join the hunters in the killing. The girl was still, only her eyes moving from one foe to another, no doubt her mind coming up with ways to fight them, force them to kill her. Laufey turned to his other son. "Then, take her, if you can. Let's see how you overpower a warrior determined to die."

Out of the shadows of the throne stepped a Jotun and all eyes turned to him. He was short and slender, small for a Jotun, not wearing any weapons. His furs were white, and he had no trophies of slain beasts. Helblindi growled low, coming between the young Jotun and Lady Sif.

"Loki, you forget your place. She's my prisoner. Is this a first time you see a woman you think you can take?" Helblindi let out a mocking laughter, his hunters joining him. Lady Sif was obviously confused, looking at the young Jotun with raised eyebrows, then frowning as she heard Helblindi's words.

"Decided it's time to finally get some? I'd love to give her to you, little brother! Maybe after me and my men have had her!"

The laughter and the cruel threat made Lady Sif's cheeks pale a little, but she didn't break her posture. Her jaw clenched tighter, her mind set into finding a quick death.

Loki only leaned away from Helblindi, then lifted his jaw in defiance. "King Laufey gave me his permission to take her. Will you let me take a shot, brother? If I can get her to lay on my feet, will you let me have her?" His voice was soft, persuasive.

Helblindi snorted and laughed suspiciously. "You think because she's smaller than you she's easy prey? Fine, you get one chance. And if you fail..." Helblindi leaned over to Loki, "I'll add another scar to your skin." Helblindi set his hand on his knife, but Loki seem not to care. With almost bored look on his face he stepped past Helblindi and walked closer to the Asgardian. She stood legs spread, hands bound in front of her, face lifted up, and defiant.

"I'll lay on your feet when I'm dead!" she growled through her clenched jaw. Loki stood there, looking at her, her hair now almost white with frost, eyes of steel, blood starting to bleed through her clothes.

"Let's make this quick", Loki whispered, and took one step closer.

Lady Sif attacked, trying to use her shackles as weapons, swinging at Loki's head. With grace Loki dodged and moved right next to her. His fingertips only brushed her face, and a green flash threw her off her feet. The girl landed on the snow, and stayed there. Loki stepped next to her, so her body was at her feet. He turned to the throne.

"Well, Helblindi?"

Helblindi only growled. The hunters took it as a sign and started to close on Loki and the Asgardian, but King Laufey's voice stopped them.

"The girl is his. He won by magic, not force. Loki, it's good to see you have used this time to make something of yourself." Laufey leaned back to rest against his throne. "Helblindi, don't forget my ears are still in this world even when my mind wanders elsewhere. It is my will Loki takes the Asgardian and does as he wants with her."

With those words King Laufey closed his eyes and drifted back to sleep.

 

 

Loki looked down to the unconscious girl on his bed of furs. After the King had fallen asleep, there had been some dissatisfaction amongst the hunters, but Helblindi had decided to follow his fathers ruling. Loki had gathered Lady Sif on his arms and carried her inside the ruins. He had been able to keep his posture until he was sure no one was looking. After that he had half carried, half dragged the girl to his chambers. She was heavier than she appeared. Smaller than Jotun women she was, pink skin and brown hair, and warm. The moment Loki has seen her, he had been struck by her beauty. Then he had seen her nature, hard and strong. Steel had to be forged in fire. Steel that was hard as ice.

Lady Sif would stay under the spell for some time. When she'd wake up, she would be angry. Loki let out a sight.

"Now, what am I going to do with you?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sif isn't in a trustful mood, and Loki isn't good at being trustworthy.

**CHAPTER 2**

Loki returned to his chamber to find Sif still sleeping, unmoved. Carefully he put down the bowl he was carrying and bend over to examine her. His only warning was a sudden hiss of breath, and then her shackled hands were on his throat. Loki tried to pull pack, away from her grip. Sif followed, throwing her weight against him. Loki tripped over the bowl he had set on the floor, and they both went down. Sif had to let go of his throat to protect her face from hitting the floor, and Loki used the advantage to push himself away. He expected a new attack and summoned his magic. Instead of charging, Sif got on to her feet and ran out the door.

Loki just snorted softly and waited. He listened to her footsteps, then heard a thump as she must have slipped on ice. More hurried footsteps, coming and going. Finally, all was quiet. He got up and walked to the door.

"The whole palace in a maze of ice. Half of the corridors are blocked by fallen ceilings", he called to Sif. "There's only one way out of here, and I have sealed it with ice. You couldn't open it even if you knew where it was." Then he turned back to the room.

Soon enough Loki heard Sif sneaking towards the door. She was good, but he had been waiting for footsteps on ice since childhood. Sometimes they came sneaking, just for the fun of making a surprise attack. Loki had learned to listen, not for the sound of attackers, but for the ice.

Just as Sif's steps stopped at the door, Loki sat down to clean up the spilled contents of his bowl. His back was turned to the door, and he could sense the tension as Sif peeked inside. She withdrew, he kept his back turned. No attack came.

"I know you know I'm here. I'm not that stupid, to fall for such obvious trick", she declared.

"Good to know. Do you want to come inside? I have food." Loki stood up and turned to the door. Sif was peeking at him. He offered the bowl to her to see. There was meat, few plumb mushrooms and black roots. Loki saw contempt passing on Sif's face.

"It's not what an Asgardian is used to, I'm sure. But here it's not wise to dismiss anything edible", Loki said.

Sif grimaced. "It's not the food I loathe, it's you! Trying to put me off my guard with food so you can force yourself on me. I'll rather starve!"

"Am I forcing myself on you, Lady Sif?" Loki asked. This needed to be cleared up right away if he wanted to get her to calm down.

"I heard what you said!" Sif hissed furiously.

"I never said I would hurt you. What you think you heard me say I only said to keep you alive. I couldn't beg mercy for you, I had to convince others I was going to do something worse than death to you." Loki looked Sif in the eye, talking with soft, clear voice. He needed her to understand this.

"So, you put me under your spell and locked me here with you just to... what!? Have dinner with me?" Sif stepped from behind the door frame. She was holding an icicle with tip sharp as knife.

Loki noticed her fingers were turning blue. The cold of the shackles combined with her weapon must have made her hands burn with cold.

"If I'd wanted to have my way with you, I would have done so when you were unconscious. If I'd really wanted to impress my brother I would have done it in front of him and his men, and woken you up just so you could see my knife before I slit your throat." Loki's voice was still very calm. He didn't want to sound like he was threatening Sif, but she had to understand this wasn't Asgard. There was no honour or kindness for her in here. "As for the ice blockage, it's there more for keeping things out than you in. In Jotunheim you live only if you take what you need, and right of the strongest goes over any command King Laufey might give. My brother or any of his men would take you from me if they got the chance."

Sif hadn't moved, still clutching the weapon. Frost had settled on her hair again, and Loki could see her lips shaking. It wasn't fear, or at least it was mostly the cold that made her shake.

"And you? If everyone here are selfish, cruel monsters, the aren't you one too?" Shakes made Sif's voice tremor and her teeth rattle.

Loki had thought of how to convince that his motives weren't monstrous, and he didn't have the time to do that. He would have to lie. Fortunately, he was good at it, and one thing he knew about lies was that some amount of truth made them easier to swallow.

"I am not like the others. You can go ask any Jotun, and they'll tell you that I'm a freak, not one of them and unfit to live among them. I'm an outcast, though I was born a prince, son of King Laufey. I have done my best to survive here but I'm done. I want to leave." Loki spoke with his eyes fixed on Sif's, unblinking and unwavering. "If I help you, keep you safe, find you a way home, you can pay your debt by letting me come with you, and telling your king what I have done. Deal?"

"I can't make a deal with someone I don't trust", Sif said through clenched teeth.

"Let me take off those shackles, then. As a sign of trust", Loki offered, carefully stepping closer to Sif. She stepped back, lifting her icy weapon.

"Your hands are turning white", Loki said with low, calm voice. "Right now they're numb, but soon they will turn black. Then you'll start losing fingers. You can't hold a weapon or defend yourself like that."

Sif kept her steely gaze at him, then her face softened a bit. She lifted her hands and turned the icicle slightly away from Loki. "Do it."

Loki reached out his hand and placed two fingertips on the shackles. Immediately the shattered into fine dust of ice, falling to the floor into a glittering pile. Sif didn't admire the trick, though, but pulled her hands against her chest, rubbing the wrists against each other. There were bruises showing against her fine skin. She gasped for air as the blood started to flow in her veins, reawakening the pain. The icicle dropped to the floor.

 

 

Sif had dragged one sleeping fur to the other side of the room and wrapped another around her. She sat gross-legged on the fur, her back straight and eyes on the Jotun. Stinging pain in her wrists was finally melting away. She had taken piece of dried meat, and chewed on it while thinking. The Jotun boy, Loki, stood on his side of the room, leaning one shoulder to the wall, arms crossed. He seemed relaxed. Sif wasn't quite sure, was it an act, and if in reality he was just as confused as she was. Reading those blood red eyes was difficult.

When the Jotun hunters had brought her to King Laufey, Sif had been ready to die. Now the fire of life in her was flaming, and she wanted to grasp the opportunity of returning to Asgard. _A warrior isn't afraid to die, but will not surrender to death_ , she reminded herself. So, she should take on Loki's offer for help. Only she had to make sure this wasn't some scheme, designed to harm Asgard.

Sif swallowed the last pieces of meat and licked the salty grease from her fingers. "Do you want to prove you are to be trusted? Fine. Get me back my sword and shield. Then we'll talk about trust."

Loki's eyes spread. "Your weapons? They've already been shared as loot. Not even my brother could order the hunters to give them up, especially since the satisfaction of killing you was denied from them."

"I don't care. I want my weapons so I don't have to resort to pieces of ice to defend myself. Keeping me unarmed won't win my trust." Sif lifted her eyebrow at Loki.

"I really don't think I can get them back for you. But I can arrange you a weapon, if that's what it takes. Wait here." Loki left the room, and as quietly she could, Sif bounced after him, wanting to see where the exit out of the maze of ice was. But when she reached the corridor outside the room, Loki had already disappeared into the deep blue twilight.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reminiscing past events, both old and recent.

_"My king, the child is still wailing. It's been seven days."_

_"You don't need to tell me what I can hear with my own ears. Don't you have the courage to say what you think in straight words?"_

_"The Old Law says children born malformed are to be left for dead. But if they can survive seven days, Norns want them to live!"_

_"Norns! They would give me a runt for a child, take my wife and see our realm destroyed by the Aesir. I don't care if they want the runt to live. Go get him yourself if you want, Gjalp, and be gone."_

_"He's still your son, a prince of Jotunheim."_

_"Jotunheim has a prince, Helblindi shall rule when the time comes. A strong brother would have been good, they would have fought each other, growing stronger until the better one would slay the other to take the throne. But that thing won't survive."_

_"He has survived already. My king, don't you see? He is probably strong in magic, even if his body is so small. He might not be a match to Helblindi. But Helblindi can hardly use magic. They would compliment each other."_

_"Jotunheim cannot have two rules. But I don't care. Get the child, do what you will with him, Gjalp. I shall sleep now!"_

 

 

Loki walked the icy corridors of the ruined Temple with soft and silent feet. Once this place had been a centre of Jotunheim. It had been full of life and purpose. Now there was just silence and piled up snow. Most Jotuns had deserted the place after the war. It was only a reminder of the humiliation the Aesir had caused. No one wanted to stay and watch the sleeping King.

Helblindi and his hunters had claimed the most preserved part of the palace to themselves. Rest of the desolation was Loki's. Of course, Helblindi and his men didn't see it that way, but all the same Loki had claimed the old ruins by investigating them thoroughly. He knew the secrets of his home, and in a way, considered himself richer than his brother who had surrounded himself with the leftovers of the old glory. Loki had knowledge.

Loki entered a old hall. Its roof had collapsed partially and debris of ice covered the floor. On the walls one could still see old carvings, hollow lines of arches and circles. Once they had been filled with diamonds and precious stones. Now everything had been carved away and taken. Loki didn't care any more if the takers had been the Aesir or his own brother. For a moment he closed his eyes and listened. The hum of ice was calm and undisturbed. He dared to step away from the doorway and crossed the hall, climbing over chunks of ice.

On the other side Loki placed his hand on one of the hollow lines. He ran his hand along it, feeling rather than remembering. Finally one spot felt different. Loki pressed softly, and a panel opened on the wall. It was hidden in the arching lines, and had stayed closed and unnoticed even when someone had taken a knife and scraped all the precious stones from around it. The young Jotun pulled the panel off and reached inside. He shoved aside an old skull that had still small pieces of thin, blue skin attached to it. Few more bones clattered under his touch, and he pulled out a sword with beautifully worked handle and sheath. When he unsheathed it, the blade was still bright and sharp. Loki didn't know whose weapon it had been, or who was the Jotun hero who had taken it as a trophy. Both had been dead for quite some time now, and had very little need for the weapon. Loki replaced the panel. Another click sealed the tomb like it had never been disturbed. Again he listened to the ice, making sure he was alone before heading back.

 

 

Sif sat in the cold, waiting for Loki's return. She chewed on one of the black roots, finding it bland in taste but surprisingly filling, and it gave warmth to her belly. For little while she was worried it was a sign of poisoning, but felt nothing else alarming.

Earlier Sif had spent a good time mapping the maze of ice outside the room. None of the dead ends looked like it had been opened, but she took herself a good mental image of the walls. Maybe next time she could see which way Loki used by detecting any changes in the ice.

Cold made her tired, and finally she just threw herself on the fur and laid on her back, staring at the ceiling. After a while she realised the ice wasn't one, solid colour but a whirl of blues and greens. It had transparency in it, letting light through even when there wasn't a clear source of light. It made Sif think of the cave she had decided to investigate, and had led her here. What a great plan it had been...

Sif had recently returned from her training with the Valkyrie and tried to settle down to Asgard. She loved the golden city, but found the formal life in the court restricting. More than often she rode a horse outside the city to get to know the countryside outside Asgard. There wasn't much of it. Asgard relied much on Vanaheim for food, but there were fields, golden as the city, and mountains, which Sif begun to explore regularly. She also searched for maps and such, to better know her surroundings there. She had come across a scroll with a tale of a ice cave on the mountains, that would stay frozen even during the warmest summer days. Sif had tried to interest Thor and the warrior three to accompany her to find the cave, but they had had other plans, concerning killing and drinking. "Why would we even want to see a cold cave?" Volstagg had asked. "When it's summer, I want to enjoy the warm. During winter there's enough cold to go around!"

Sif wondered if the men remembered her plans to find the cave when they finally noticed she was missing. Would anyone figure out to look for her in there, or in Jotunheim?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote the first chapters some time ago, before there was any information on how the Valkyries fit into MCU. In various other Marvel medias Sif has a close relationship with Brunnhilde and the Valkyries, so I went with it for this fic. I thought if should change it and remove the mention of the Valkyries. I decided to keep it, since I'll be ignoring a lot of MCU canon anyway.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sif is finally starting to warm up.

"I'm coming in, don't get exited", Loki announced himself from the hallway and before stepping into his chambers. Sif jumped to her feet, letting the fur she was wrapped in fall to the icy floor. The young Jotun carried a sword with him. Sif's eyes moved from the weapon to Loki's face carefully, to see if he was about to use it at her.

"You are so distrustful." Loki hid his fear with a gently mocking smile. "I'm only bringing you the sword you asked for." Loki held the sword with two hands and offered it to Sif. She moved closer slowly. This was getting on his nerves, she was acting if he was a beast that would attack her any moment.

"Just come and take it! I-" Loki's words were cut short, as with one, smooth motion Sif reached for the sword, pulled it from its sheath and pointed the tip of the blade at his throat. Loki tensed, still holding the sheath in his outstretched hands. He resisted the urge to swallow. Sif looked at him over the blade, her eyes just as cold as the steel.

"How thoughtful of you to bring me a sword that's longer than your arms. You can't put a spell on me if you can't reach and touch me", Sif taunted.

"Are you sure?" Loki tried to speak without moving the muscles of his throat too much. Sif was right, he relied on touch with most of his magic, but he wanted to make her bit unsure. And of course, he could just touch the blade and freeze it too cold to touch, but the Aesir might just shove it through his throat any way. "If you kill me now, this chamber will be your grave. You can't get out." Loki hoped he didn't sound as frightened as he was.

"That's why I didn't kill you right away. You are going to let me out of here", Sif said with a smirk. "Keep holding that sheath. If I see it drop, I'll run you through and worry about the ice afterwards."

Sif circled Loki until she was behind his back. Whole time she kept the tip of the blade so close to his neck, he could feel it caressing the fine hair on his skin. He tried to hold back the shivers it sent up and down his spine. He had been struck by Sif's beauty, and impressed by her spirit, but now he realised she was also deadly. It didn't make him any less infatuated. And Helblindi had thought Loki had simply wanted someone he could overpower. That made Loki chuckle softly.

"You think this is funny?" Sif rasped behind his back. "Move, to the corridors, and show me where the exit is."

"Oh, I'm not laughing at you, lady", Loki assured and started carefully walking towards the door. "It seems I'm the fool here. I thought an Asgardian would be honourable, but I should have known you see now reason to keep your word to a Jotun."

"What word? You have imprisoned me, so don't be surprised if I do what it takes to escape." Sif followed Loki, the sword between them and its blade close his neck.

"You said, if I bring you a weapon, we'll talk. About trust." Loki led them to the corridors. "On the hindsight, that was really stupid of me. You see, I've learned not to trust, anyone. I just thought you would be an exception, and by giving a weapon I could show you I'm not keeping you a prisoner."

Loki felt Sif stopping. He halted too, and tried to turn to face her. Sudden sting of the blade on his neck made him turn back sharply. "Just... put down that sword. If you want to know the exit, I'll show it to you. You don't need to stab me." Loki grimaced, feeling his blood trickle down his skin. A familiar sensation.

  


  


First Sif thought Loki's blood was black, as it ran down against his blue skin. Then it reached his white furs, staining them bright red. Sif had heard the tales of the war with Jotunheim, and how the Jotun shattered like ice when killed. She was confused seeing Loki bleed red blood. From what she had heard and seen, she had thought them creatures of living ice, beasts who were clever, had only feelings of hate, and were capable of only cruelty. Not once had she heard of a Jotun who would help anyone. In some stories they could be of use, but only if they were forced or tricked into helping.

"You're not wrong. It's really difficult to think you as anything else but a threat to me when I see your blue skin and red eyes, Jotun", Sif said, almost as to reminder herself of what she was dealing with.

"Oh, if that's the problem, I can help you", Loki said, and before Sif's eyes his skin started to turn from blue to pale, and this time Sif didn't stop him from turning around. Loki's skin was now smooth, and his eyes had turned into emerald green. Feathery tips of his black hair rested against the red-stained white furs.

Sif stood confused. _I didn't realise before he's so beautiful,_ a traitor thought popped in her head, and to banish it, Sif raised her sword. "What trick is this?"

"A simple one, if you are a shape-shifter as I am." Loki had strange satisfaction in his voice. "I could change your appearance too, thought that would only be an illusion. My change, however, is touch proof. Try it, if you want."

Sif reached her hand towards Loki, not noticing how he swallowed back a surprised grin. She kept the blade between them, placed her hand on his arm and pulled back, as if expecting his skin to burn her with cold. Sif's eyebrows knitted in confusion. She touched him again, and felt Loki shivering as her callused hand carefully ran along his arm. 

"You feel warm", she breathed out.

Loki had been holding his breath, and let out a slow sigh. "Yes, when I take a form, the change goes deeper that the skin. Actually, the cold feels kind of unpleasant now. But I'll endure it if that's what it takes to gain your trust." This time he grinned in a most annoying manner at Sif. She narrowed her eyes at him.

"Don't think I'm fooled this easily. A warrior won't believe only what can be seen with her eyes. But I'll give you another chance. I'll put down my sword and you can show the way out." Sif dropped the blade and took a step back. Loki relaxed a bit and offered the sheath to her. Sif took it, but didn't sheath the sword yet, just gestured Loki to continue. He turned to walk down the corridod and touched the wound in his neck. His pulled his fingertips away, and they were covered in red. Loki licked the blood off them, and the sight made Sif suddenly blush. Embarrassed, she cleared her throat and Loki turned to look at her.

"Did you say something, my lady?"

"Nothing. Stop calling me that and keep walking!" Sif wondered, how this situation had turned from her holding Loki on sword's end to her blushing at the sight of him, and she had the urge to wipe that smirk off his face with her fists. Apparently Loki sensed it wasn't a good idea to annoy her further, and they walked in silence.

Loki led them to an dead end. Sif tried to see if the wall had changed from the last time she had seen it, but the swirls in the ice seemed same as before. Loki noticed her looking at the wall and smiled. 

"You are looking at the wrong way." Then the young Jotun in Aesir form climbed the up the wall effortlessly. Reaching the ceiling, he touched the ice. His hand turned back to blue as the ice under it twirled and moved to reveal an opening. Sif could see dark blue sky and white snow flakes flying. Some of them fell through the opening, and drifted down on her face.

Loki looked down at Sif, and then closed the opening. He climbed back, and the blue in his hand had faded as his feet touched the floor. He opened and closed his fist as if trying to get blood flowing in his fingers.

"If I use magic to manipulate ice, my natural form will reveal itself", he explained to Sif.

"And that's your exit?" Sif was still looking at the ceiling. She could climb up, no problem, but breaking the ice in a position like that would be difficult.

"That's my way out, as in out of the palace when I want to leave unnoticed. I also have access to certain parts of the palace. It took me some time to set this place for myself", Loki explained, again with some pride in himself.

"Impressive", Sif replied absent-mindedly. Men always seemed to want praises. "And if I had brought you all the way here on sword point, what would you have done?"

"I would have tried to reason with you all the same. You couldn't have followed me up there with your sword." Loki scraped some of the dried blood off his skin. "But I'm glad I talked you to lowering your sword before you poked more holes in me."

"It's just a small wound. Probably the tiniest wound a Aesir has inflicted upon a Jotun in all the history of nine realms", Sif grinned at him. "If you like, I can still give you something worth crying for."

Loki laughed nervously, and it eased Sif's mind to know that he feared her.

"How about we return to my chamber now? We should talk, and it seems you are a bit more relaxed as long as I look like this. But I'm getting cold, so..." Loki gestured towards the way they came from.

"Really? You're cold?" Sif lifted her eyebrow in humorous disbelief as she walked down the corridor.

"In this form, yes. I'm not as defenceless against cold as you are, but you might notice, I'm not wearing much." Loki pulled his furs a bit tighter.

Sif had noticed indeed his exposed midriff, how slender it was, yet well toned. She had seen men without shirts on training grounds before, thin young men starting their training, or old, scarred, hairy, bulky veterans. She only ever looked at them as opponents, looking for their weaknesses. As she should do now, instead of wondering about the bones of his hips, curving just above the furs, and the slightest fuzz of hair that started under his navel and travelled down...

Sif snapped her head up and fixed her eyes forward. She speeded up her step as she sheathed her sword with an angry thrust. "Let's get you covered up, then. I'd hate to see you dying from cold just as I decided to spare your life, Jotun", she shouted angrily, without turning to look back.

Which was lucky for Loki, because if Sif had seen the grin on his face, she would have killed him on the spot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another bit of ignored MCU canon; movies confirmed that Loki's illusions break when touched. I kept with the idea that he is a legit shape-shifter, which is different kind of magic from casting illusions. So he can transform himself and won't change back even when touched. Only concentrating on magic or using it to manipulate ice will return him to his default form.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki is a sneaky little shit. What else is new?

King Laufey stood on a field of bones, knee deep in the shattered remains of his enemies. They were perfect white, like snow. Carrion birds flew high above him in the grey and red sky. He picked up a skull of some sub-creature and crushed it in his blue grip.

One of the carrion birds circled down, and Laufey lifted his gaze to follow it's descent. As it closed in, he saw that it was small, black and white with blue tips in its wings and red eyes. It landed on arched rib bones of some beast. Laufey looked at it with disdain.

"Father", the bird croaked.

"Loki. Why do you seek me out? You know I don't care for your presence. Did you mistake my passing approval as a sign of affection? Be gone, you annoying child." The Jotun king turned away from the dream image of his son and picked up a another skull to crash.

"I only came to tell you something. But if you want to settle for old bones instead of fresher revenge, I'll take my leave." Loki's voice wasn't a croak any more, and Laufey glanced over his shoulder to see the young Jotun sitting in a new form. He was still covered in black and white feathers on his arms and shoulders, but his body was closer to normal, only lighter and bird-like. He had thrown a scaled leg over the other and clasped his hands on his knee. There was a mocking look in his red eyes, now surrounded by smaller feathers.

Laufey found it a bit unnerving that the young Jotun had become so skilled in controlling his dream image. He pushed himself, making his own form larger, with black bone spikes pushing through his skin. "Wipe that smirk of your face, boy, and state your business. Or I will add your bones to my collection."

"My bones aren't here, sire, but I understand the sentiment. I have no desire to rot alive while my dream image lays crushed among these bones. To the point then. The Aesir girl you gave me..."

"If you came here to recite the torments you've subjected her to, I don't care." Laufey interrupted him. "Go tell about it to your brother, he might find them interesting."

Loki closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "No, sire, I would never bother you with something like that. And, I haven't touched the girl, actually. I came up with a plan, and she has proved most easy target for manipulation. The Aesir are, like you have said, brutes, who understand only strength. I gave her a sword and she thinks I'm her ally now."

"You gave her a sword?" Laufey barked in surprise. "Do tell, how does that work for your plan?"

"Simple. I have convinced her that I hate my own kind, and that I'm ready to help her escape in exchange of a refuge in Asgard. All she needed was a little toy as a token of 'trust', and now she is eating from my hand." Loki chuckled softly. "Once I'm in Asgard, it should be only a question of time until I've gained access to the Casket of Ancient Winters. I can get it back, Father. I can return us to our glory."

Laufey only looked at Loki. Was the runt serious? Did he think that fooling Odin would be as easy as tricking a lost little girl? Then again, Laufey had nothing to lose here. If the runt would get himself killed or captured, good riddance. But if he did succeed... Laufey couldn't help the cold pleasure of revenge washing over him. He would be a real King again, and he could lead his men once more against Asgard. This time they wouldn't waste effort on lesser realms and weaker beings.

Loki sat waiting, unmoving on his bony seat, and Laufey pulled himself back to his normal shape. He formed his face into a smile of acceptance. "You really have been making yourself useful. But I still don't see why you came to me with this."

"I only wanted to let you know what I'm planning. I intend to make this credible, so I won't tell Helblindi a thing, and if he notices the escape, I expect him to put on a good show for me." Loki's face twisted with contempt for his brother. "Harder we must fight for the way out, the better the girl's tale will be once we reach her home. If the girl truly believes that I'm at her side, she will help me to convince the rest of the Aesir."

Loki pulled his feet underneath him and jumped up to stand on the curved bone. "When I will return with the Casket, I suspect my brother might think of me as a traitor. Maybe my King would remember this conversation, and assure Helblindi that my actions were designed for the best of Jotunheim?"

Laufey tilted his head and took a long look at Loki. He had deep hatred for his son, and the king suspected the young Jotun returned the sentiment. But there was power and strength in him, different from what Laufey or Helblindi had, but perhaps useful. "Go then, test your intelligence and magic against the Aesir, and if you return with the Casket, I shall see you rewarded. That is what you want, isn't it?"

"I'm sure my King will find a suitable reward." Loki's mouth twisted in to a smile. "Then, when we call for the gatekeeper of Bifrost to open a portal for us, you won't rise from your throne to lead our men in to a battle? It might make it difficult for me to cross over if I'm mistaken for the vanguard of Jotunheim's horde."

Laufey snorted. "I won't interfere. But if Helblindi cuts your 'escape' short, don't expect my help. If you can't fool him, you wouldn't stand a chance against Odin."

"I'm glad to know we both share the same estimate of my brother's mental capacity. Goodbye, sire." Loki lifted his arms above his head, and with a sound of wings hitting air, he was gone.

Laufey turned back to the bones.

 

 

Sif sat on her own pile of sleeping furs and watched sleeping Loki. Or he looked like he was sleeping, but he had explained it was some sort of spell.

"I trust you quite a lot, Sif." Loki had said. "While I'm under the spell you could skin me alive and I could not do a thing. If you really want me dead, this is your chance." After those words he had laid back and closed his eyes, and with a deep exhale fallen asleep.

Sif watched his chest raising and falling in a steady rhythm. After a while she crept next to him, and waived her hand in front of his face. When that evoked no reaction, Sif pinched his cheek. It burned her fingertips with cold, but the Jotun did not flinch. With her other hand Sif pulled his eye open. The eye was covered in white sheen, and Sif pulled quickly away. She seated herself on her own furs, keeping watch over Loki.

Before falling asleep the young Jotun had returned to his blue form, explaining that using magic would do it anyway. Sif could still see Loki in Aesir form, a double image of blue and pale. Now she couldn't unsee his beautiful features, even in the blue skin, covered with the curvy lines. And the lines on his chest and stomach only emphasized his lean body. Sif found herself following the lines with her eyes. She wondered if she'd dare to throw a fur on Loki to stop herself from looking, but she had no idea how to explain it to him. Sif felt that he was laughing at her behind her back anyway, and she didn't want to give him more ideas.

After a long a wait Loki finally stirred. His body twitched, and his head lulled from side to side. He made a soft sound before opening his eyes. Between blinking Sif could see his eyes turning from milky pink to blood red.

"Well?" she demanded.

"Give me a moment", Loki groaned. He lifted his hand to his face and pulled himself in a half sitting position. "I really stretched myself there. I have a headache."

"So? You can still talk, so tell me what happened there." Sif leaned forward, making impatient gesture.

"Ugh, fine! You are so brutal... I met Laufey, and I convinced him to stay still once the Bifrost opens. Just like I thought he didn't offer any help with Helblindi, but I can handle him on my own." Loki leaned to press his head between his knees. "I feel sick."

Sif was still suspicious. Loki had told her that he would meet with his father and make him believe he was scheming against Asgard and have him help their escape. Sif was uncertain who was being lied to, Laufey or her.

"How do you know he believed you? Isn't Laufey a master of scheming himself? Maybe he's just toying with you."

"Bwah!" Loki scoffed, his head still between his legs, arms hugging his knees. "He might have been, once. Now he's a ruin of what he was, scavenging his old memories of past victories, running from his own failure. He's letting the Jotun go to ruin by allowing my brother rule us alongside his band of so called hunters."

Sif was going to point out that Loki didn't sound like someone who was going to betray his own kind, but then she noticed the sound of Loki's breathing.

"Are you crying?" she asked, disbelieved.

"I told you, my head hurts!" Loki didn't look at Sif, but laid himself down, curled up with his back turned to Sif. She was too shocked to say or do anything. Sif had never heard of a Jotun crying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm pulling all this magic and dream walking out of my ass.
> 
> Also: I don't know how to work with AO3. Sorry, i my posting and deleting and posting messes up things for anyone!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This time it's Loki's turn to warm up.

 "You should wear this." Loki held out a white fur for Sif. Look on her face was suspicious, and Loki rolled his eyes. "Those red leathers you wear are very nice, but outside they'll stick out like blood on snow. And you'll freeze." Her constant paranoia was getting on his nerves.

"I thought you would use a spell on me," Sif protested.

"Only if I have no choice. It's tiring to keep up an illusion all the time. And it wouldn't protect you from the cold. Just wear this over your own clothes," Loki explained.

"I was better equipped, but your brother's men took most of my stuff." Sif took the fur gingerly and tried to set it on her shoulders.

"Be glad they didn't strip you to your skin. Here, let me help with that", Loki tried to offer a hand but Sif dodged away from his extended hands. Loki let out a frustrated sigh. After all he had done for her, she still acted as if he'd attack any moment.

Sif found the clamp and managed to close it. The fur was meant for someone much larger and taller, covering Sif from shoulders to her shins. She tested the movement of her arms, and pulled the sword from its sheath. Loki couldn't help but to admire the fluid movements, and how a curly strand of dark hair looked tangled in the white fur.

"What?" Sif asked when he noticed Loki's keen look.

"Oh, you just look like a snow bear cub." Loki grinned at her. "You are just about the right size."

 

 

Later they were standing on the roof of the palace, or at least on a piece of what was left of it. Loki crouched down to close their exit, and Sif looked around her. The blue and white wasteland of snow spread around them. To Sif's eyes, it was a dreary sight. Getting captured by the Jotun hunters had not been something she wanted, but had she been left on her own, she might have already died. And the hunters would have killed her, too. Sif had to admit, Loki had saved her.

"There's a collapsed part where we can climb down using the rabble", Loki pointed the way. "There's usually no guards, but my brother might get fits of productivity and order his hunters to act like they were worth something. And sometimes they come snooping around, trying to find something to stuff in their bags. So, keep an eye out."

Sif followed Loki and carefully they descended from the roof. They sneaked along the palace walls. Even when walking right next to him, Sif couldn't hear Loki's footsteps on the snow. He was perfectly adapted to his ancestral surroundings. Sif on the other hand was already feeling her toes going numb, and her fur coat felt heavy and clumsy.

"Stay here", Loki whispered. He dodged away from the wall, ran across the snow covered yard and disappeared among the snow. Sif waited, her senses scanning the surroundings for enemies. Then Loki appeared from behind a mound of snow and gestured Sif to join him. She ran to him, and the cracking of the snow under her feet sounded like it would echo all the way to King Laufey's throne. Once they were out of plain sight, hidden among the snow, Loki continued to lead the way.

Jotunheim and Asgard had once shared a more friendly bond, and there had been several points where Bifrost would open and allow travel in both direction. During the war most of these places had been destroyed, and the one near the palace was too close and maybe even guarded. But Loki had been sure he could take them to one trading point and Sif could call for rescue there. All they had to do was leave the palace unnoticed and make the icy trek with hardly any food, shelter or equipment.

"That's your plan?" Sif had asked, and Loki had grinned at her.

"If it's too difficult and dangerous for you I try and come up with something else."

After that, Sif had not said a word of complaint, to show Loki she wasn't weak or afraid.

As the dark blue sky of Jotunheim was turning darker and darker with every step, and the cold seemed to be burning Sif's feet through the soles of her boots, she wondered if she should have protested a bit. They would have to stop for the night, and once she would stop, how cold would she get then? She was already tired to her bones, and kept moving only be sheer determination.  _Move your legs, take a step, another, move your legs_ , Sif recited to herself. Deep snow and cold ate away her strength, and finally she was just trotting along, her eyes following the shallow footprints before her. She didn't notice Loki had stopped, and walked into his arms. Sif jumped back in surprise, but the young Jotun was looking over her, then tilted his head a bit, listening.

"We are being followed", he said.

Sif felt bit of energy returning to her as sense of danger went through her. "Is it your brother and his men?"

"Who else? I think my brother decided to pay me a visit and found us gone." Loki's mouth twisted as he had a bad taste on his mouth. "We need to hide. There's no way to fight or outrun them."

Sif's eyes swept over the quickly darkening landscape. Where could they hide, behind a mound of snow? But she followed Loki, trusting him to know his own land well enough to find something. By the speed the young Jotun was moving, Sif was starting to understand he had as little desire to be caught as she did.

To Sif's eye every heap of snow looked the same, but Loki was looking for something, and the warrior did her best to just keep up. The need to survive gave her strength but it was fading fast. Finally Loki stopped. Sif watched as he pressed his hand against the snow, his face in a concentrated frown. The snow under his hand started moving, in almost painfully slow motion. Inside of the snow mound was clear ice, and now there was a scooped cave inside it.

"Get in", Loki whispered. "I'll close you in, track back to hide our footprints and come back."

Sif slipped inside the cold cave, and as soon as she was in, Loki sealed the opening. Only a small crack was left open to let air in. Sif huddled inside her great fur coat, now happy for how thick and large it was. Her eyes stayed on the faint line of dim light. Her hands found her sword, and she waited.

There seemed to be a heavy weight on Sif's eyelids. Harder she tried to concentrate on the light, more often her eyes just closed on their own. Finally, when she yanked her eyes open, there was no light left. Her first horrible thought was that the crack had closed, and she would suffocate. Then she realised it was full night outside, and there was no light to shine. The young warrior relaxed a bit, as much as she could trapped in an ice cave, hunted by Jotun men and soon freezing to death. Sif laughed quietly at herself. She had wanted an adventure, hadn't she?

Then her ears picked a sound, something scratching above her.

"Sif? It's me, don't stab me", Loki whispered and then the ice opened to let him in, closing again behind him. "We need to spend the night in here. I lost them from our tracks, but Helblindi might still order them to swipe the surrounding." His voice was a hurried whisper. "We need to be very still."

Sif agreed by obeying him.

The cave was very small, and now Loki was almost pressing against Sif and she could feel his body radiating cold. She couldn't help the violent shivers taking over her body. Even her breathing was trembling with every exhale and inhale despite her best efforts to keep it down.

"Loki, I'm freezing", she finally managed to whisper, her teeth clamping and rattling against each other. She was huddled in a small ball, hugging herself.

Then she felt warm hands touching her face. In the dark she couldn't tell, but apparently Loki had changed his form. The hands slid down, found the clamp and tugged at it.

"What are you doing?" Sif breathed out.

Loki opened the clamp and pulled the fur coat open. "We need to share our body heat. Otherwise we'll both freeze."

Sif couldn't argue or resist when she felt the warm body pressing against her. They both pulled at the fur, wrapping it around them as tight as they could. Sif pressed her body against the sweet warmth, pure survival instinct overpowering any reservations she might have had. She felt an arm snaking around her waist. She tensed a bit, then allowed to be drawn closer to Loki. Her head met his shoulder, and it felt natural to press her cheek against him.  _I'm so tired, but I can't sleep like this_ , was the last thought Sif had before dropping into deep sleep.

 

 

Loki held Sif tight, feeling her breath on his neck and collarbones. He didn't remember being this close to anyone in a long time, and in addition he was feeling a strange flush of warmth in his body. Sharing body heat wasn't something the Jotun ever experienced. He wasn't sure if it was uncomfortable or not; it was something this body needed. Sif moved, burrowing her nose deeper to Loki's neck, and he couldn't help noticing his body was having other needs too. He tried shifting his position into something less intimate, but sleeping Sif only followed him, pressing tight against him. He sighted. It was going to be a long night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Digging into snow is a good way to shelter from exposure, and so is sharing body heat, but don't try this at home- er, real world, kids! This fic is not a survival guide.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> These two just keep playing hot and cold.

Loki woke as the light of the day shone into the cave from the crack above them. He turned his head carefully to look at the woman pressing against him. They were both wrapped inside the same big fur, Sif's arms around his waist, his on her shoulders. He had kept his Aesir form through the night, keeping them both warm. The fierce Asgardian was still asleep, her head resting against his chest. For a moment Loki wished he had magic that could freeze them both like this, so it would never end.

Sif moved, opened her eyes and lifted her face to look at Loki. Her eyes were hazy, lips red and moist, slightly apart. _No, this is the moment I want to keep_ , Loki thought. Then the look on her eyes sharpened, and she yanked herself as far as the tightly wrapped fur allowed. After some struggling and kicking, Loki was pushed outside the fur, Sif glaring at him.

"Good morning. And you're welcome for saving your life!" Loki spat as he returned back to his own form. Rejection wasn't new to him, but this really stung. It gave him some satisfaction to see Sif's anger disappear as she swallowed hard and looked away. Her mouth opened and closed, trying to find words. Loki waited, wanting to see if she had anything to say.

"You scared me. I'm not a morning person,” Sif said, the confusion on her face changing into sullen pride.

"Well, that makes up everything, doesn't it?" Loki snorted. "I protect you and keep you warm on the expense of my own comfort, but since I'm a horrible Jotun and you are not a morning person, it's all quite fine. Now, if your Ladyship allows, I'll get us out of here so you don't have to stand so near to me."

 

 

In the blue twilight of the Jotunheim dawn, all Sif could do was to follow Loki's lead and watch the tenseness of his back and shoulders. She really had wounded him this morning.

_Norns, have I lost my mind?_ Sif thought to herself. _Am I really worried about hurting the feelings of a Jotun? A Jotun, that has saved my life_ twice _now, though._

Sif didn't usually spend much time thinking about other people's feelings, and being hungry, tired, hunted and far away from anything safe or familiar didn't really make things easier. But trudging through the vast expanse of snow, Sif had nothing but time to think. And even someone as stubborn and prideful as her had to eventually come to the conclusion that there was only one thing she could do to improve the situation.

“Loki,” Sif spoke and stopped. The young Jotun stopped, but didn't turn, only tilted his head back a little to fling his words at Sif.

“Is my Ladyship tired? Unfortunately I can't arrange a tent and soft furs for your resting place, so you will just have to do with the snow,” he spoke with false gentleness in his voice.

“Loki,” Sif repeated the name with impatient tone, and then pursed her lips into a tight line until he turned fully to face her. Sif looked down to build up her courage, and then lifted her eyes to meet Loki's gaze. “I am sorry. I am. For this morning.”

 

 

The half pout, half scowl on the Aesir girl's face wasn't the best look for asking forgiveness, but it was sincere, and for Loki, a rare situation all and all. He had been hurt worse, even by people who had meant his own good, and none of them had ever expressed any kind of regret for it. And finally hearing a real apology, Loki found himself unable to find any response. He just stared at Sif, and when her scowl deepened, he realised he was grinning wildly. Not at the girl, but at the complete absurdity of the situation. And he finally found his wits.

“Nothing to worry about, Lady Sif. No doubt it was the the tiniest wound an Aesir has inflicted upon a Jotun,” Loki used her own barb to make light of the situation. It only made Sif scoff in frustration and anger, and Loki had to turn away lest his grin would provoke her more.

From there on they continued in silence, Loki feeling giddier than he had in years, and Sif powered by her anger and scorned pride. But eventually both of them came down from those feelings, and Sif broke the silence again.

“Loki, where are we going?”

“Only a little further away. Come,” Loki gestured Sif to follow around yet another snow bank, no different from the thousand others they had passed on their trek. But behind it came to view a whole new landscape. The blue glacier sloped down into a valley, where a white and grey river carved its way through dark evergreen forest. In the opposite end of the valley thick mists hid the source of the river.

“What is this place?” Sif asked.

“Lady Sif,” Loki made a gesture that embraced the valley and all its wild beauty. “Welcome to Utgård; my childhood home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Getting excited; this is the last chapter I have published earlier. From now on it's going to be all new material. Also lots of stuff I just made up.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki is a mountain goat/competitive luger.

The descent down to the valley was slow. The icy slope had enough unevenness to it for Sif to find foothold, but with the big fur coat and the sword on her belt, it took all her concentration to stay on her feet. Loki naturally navigated the terrain with the agility of a mountain goat. Every time Sif lifted her gaze from her own feet to look at Loki, he was perching on a tip of an ice boulder or jumping over a chasm. Although, it didn't seem to be just a show to annoy Sif, since he also scouted ahead to find the least difficult route for her to come down.

Particularly tricky spot had Sif's whole attention. She tried to squeeze through a opening in a cracked ice boulder about the size of a house, when suddenly something went past her head. Dumbfounded, Sif saw what she could only describe as a blade made of ice sticking out from the boulder. She turned to look up and behind her, and saw the silhouettes of Jotun hunters against the dark sky, standing on the bank of ice above, right on the edge of the slope. Then a cracking sound made Sif turn to look at the knife once more. From where the blade had sunken into the ice, cracks were starting to form, and the ice boulder begun to screech and shake. The hunters had never aimed for Sif's head; they intention was to trap her under the collapsing ice.

“Move!” bellowed a voice, and snapped Sif out of her horrified stupor. Loki stood on the other side of the crack, his hands on the boulder, obviously using his magic to keep it stabilised. Judging from the look of strain in his face, he couldn't hold it for long. Sif rushed towards Loki, and once she was out of the crack, the boulder collapsed behind her. The hem of her fur coat was caught in the ice, and she clawed at the clasp to open it. Just as soon as Sif was free a hail of sharp ice bolts rained down on them both. The hunters had changed position and continued their assault.

 

Another ice boulder provided enough cover for Sif and Loki to crouch behind. Sif was bleeding, and so was Loki, but the wounds were small and shallow.

“Can we fight them?” Sif asked, trying to peer over the boulder to where the hunters were while flexing her fingers to get some blood pumping into them so she could grab the sword.

“No, but we don't have to,” Loki said, and seeing Sif frown, he continued: “They can't enter Utgård. If they set a foot on this slope, it will start a clan war.”

“They can still kill us fine where we stand. They have the upper ground, Loki,” Sif growled.

“That they do. But I have a plan...” Loki glanced downwards, measuring the slope underneath them. “You might not like it, however.”

“I like whatever gets me out of this alive,” Sif huffed. “Just tell me!”

“No time!” A rapid rumble from above them warned Loki. The hunters were setting up an avalanche to bury them. “Just hold on!” Loki grabbed Sif with one arm, and hit the ice underneath them with the other. With his magic he craved out a slab out of the ice, and the second Sif's arms tightened around his waist, he kicked them on the move.

It was a common pass time of Jotun children to sled down snowy hills, and older the children, more they competed about who was the fastest, or who dared to go down down the most dangerous route. Loki, being the runt, had noticed soon that the bigger children could win in speed, having more weight to give them the momentum. But when it came to dare, no one could match him. There wasn't a steep slope, jump or obstacle track he wouldn't take on, and with his agility and ice-magic, he would come through unscratched and victorious.

Loki had never guessed that he would some day be using that experience to escape an avalanche while an Aesir girl clung to him for her life.

The ice slap was hard to hold on to, and impossible to steer. With speed they rushed downwards, Loki had to focus every bit of his magic to keep them steady. Every bump on their way nearly threw them off course, every pothole threatened to send them cartwheeling. And behind them, the wall of ice and snow tried to catch them and swallow them up.

Then finally the rocky fall was over, and they were sliding on a smooth snow. Loki dared only a brief glance behind him to see the avalanche still closing in on them. He pressed himself down as close to the ice slab as he could, keeping Sif down too. And then they were passing trees, right behind them the trunks begun to break and fall as the snow hit them and brought them down. The tall trees crashed down all around them... and then it stopped. The wall of snow stopped, the last trees fell down or came to lean against the unfallen ones. The ice slob came to an halt. Silence in the forest was more deafening than the preluding cacophony.

 

Sif was pulled from the paralysing shock by a blob of snow falling on her head from the tree above. She struggled on her feet like a new born calf. When she turned to look where they had come from, she saw where the avalanche had stopped, and just stared at the destruction around them. Then she jumped into the air and screamed.

“Norns! That was... that was amazing! Loki, you were amazing!” Sif bent over, then sprung up again, and jumped in circles, kicking the snow with her feet. “I have never done anything like that! I'm... It was the best! Loki, you did it! Loki...?”

The young Jotun hadn't moved from where the make-shift ice sled had stopped. He was curled up in a fetal position, and when Sif came over to shake him, he only lulled bonelessly under her hand. Sif tried to cup his face and shake his shoulders, but Loki didn't respond. She tried prying one eye open, but the red of Loki's eye was again covered with milky whiteness.

Sif did all she could to get Loki into more comfortable position, and then sat down on her hunches next to him. The excited high begun to wear off, and Sif realised she was getting cold. And even if Loki was Jotun, laying unconscious in snow after long exhaustion couldn't be good for him.

“What am I going to do now?” Sif sighed to the empty forest. A blade came down next to her temple, the tip of the glass-sharp ice just in her peripheral vision.

“Start by explaining what in Hel's name happened here,” a hard voice spoke behind her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short chapter, but the next one is going to compensate.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time for Loki to come clean.

Through half-sleep, Loki listened to the sounds that made him feel safe. Familiar footsteps on the creaky wooden floors, the chatter of women working, the bubbling from the pot when something was tossed into the stew. He would soon be woken up to have some of that stew, and then... what would he do today? Maybe sledding down hill, that seemed to be important.

Loki sat up and pushed aside the furs he was covered in. It wasn't a dream he was having. He was in Utgård, and that meant he had survived the avalanche. But what about Sif, where was she? Loki jumped out of the recess his bed was in (it still made him feel like a toddler, having to climb out of a bed sized for an adult Jotun) and scanned around the great hall.

Being back in Utgård was almost as big of a cultural shock than it had been when he'd been taken from there to live in the Temple. Where the ruins of the Temple were empty, all ice and stone, still bearing the memory of magnificence of the old days, great hall of Utgård was wood and busy life. Hunters and warriors sat around exchanging stories and keeping an eye on the young ones while everyone else was busy with work. Cooking, repairing the wooden structures, tanning furs, there was always something to do. Life revolved around the centre of the hall where the big pot was bubbling away. Everyone was welcome to take some of the stew, provided they had something to throw in it to keep it full.

But Loki had very little interest in the stew right now. As nostalgic this place was, he had had no intention of bringing the Aesir here. He could only pray Sif was still alive.

“Loki, you little runtling! Over here! Come say hello to your uncle!” a familiar voice boomed, and then Loki was lifted into the air. He wriggled to look down on the person holding him, and managed a weak smile.

“Hello, uncle Loke. You said I was welcome to visit any time...”

Chief of Utgård hadn't changed much since Loki last saw him. He was stocky rather than tall and the thick arms holding Loki up in the air resembled knobby roots. He wore a cape made of pelts of weasels, the heads still attached and small glass beads in their eye sockets. When he moved the weasels seemed to be turning their heads around to spy their surroundings.

Loki saw a glimpse of red behind his uncle's shoulder, and extended his neck to see Sif standing behind him. In one piece, if looking a little worse for the wear. “And I brought a friend. I hope you don't mind?”

“A friend! Ha! You hear that?” Loke turned to speak to the people in the hall, although most of them didn't seem to pay him any mind. “Little Prince Loki just happens to pop by, with his _friend_ the Aesir lady. Ymir's balls, boy!” He gave Loki a little shake and finally lowered him down on his feet. Loki managed to catch Sif's eyes, but couldn't get much out of her aside a glare before Loke pushed him on the move, rather purposefully keeping his bulk between the two.

“Now, you know I don't run Utgård like Laufey runs this sorry Realm. My people know what's going on, and they all know now you are here, and you brought the little morsel with you,” Loke said, his voice now considerably less loud. “And they know she's off limits until I say so. I have had her warmed up and fed, and she hasn't bitten off any fingers. You need some food in you too, and while you eat, you will tell me why I don't tie you two up into a neat, little bundle and carry you to Laufey myself to keep a clan war from happening.”

 

 

 

When Sif had been caught by Helblindi's hunters, they had been everything she had expected Jotuns to be; rough, cruel, merciless savages. Loki was something else, but he also didn't look like a normal Jotun. Sif had assumed he was less of a beast because he was in so many ways different from rest of his race. And now, Sif had to come to the conclusion that perhaps the Jotuns were nothing like she had been taught.

Loke had had her on sword point, but as soon as she had explained that they were on the run from Helblindi and his men, and that Loki needed help _now_ , the Jotun Chief had gathered them both up in his arms and carried to safety. Once Loki was put to rest, Sif had been given warm furs and food, and asked only what her name was and if she was going to be a smart girl who didn't raise any trouble. Loke had kept her close by, and from behind his back, Sif had had time to observe the busy life of Utgård's inhabitants.

Aside from the scale of things, Sif couldn't really say there was much difference with Asgard. Parents held their children, the children squabbled amongst themselves, elders broke up the fights and then resumed to their everyday work. It made Sif wonder Loki's previous words to her. _Everyone here are selfish, cruel monsters_. Wait, had those been _her_ words? What had Loki said, really? _In Jotunheim you live only if you take what you need._ That meant something completely different.

Sif chewed on that thought while Loki ate and between mouthfuls explained how she had fallen into Helblindi's hands and how things had went down from there. When he put down his spoon, big enough to be a ladle for Asgardian kitchen, Sif perked up. Loke wanted to hear what they were planning to do, and Sif really wanted to hear it too. So far she had been a little unclear on details of Loki's plan.

 

 

 

Loki noticed the interested look in Sif's eyes, and cleared his throat.

“Uncle, are you sure you wouldn't want to have this talk between you and me?” he asked. What he was planning to tell Loke was not exactly the same he wanted Sif to hear.

Loke raised his eyebrow and turned to look down at Sif sitting by his side.

“I think we both want to hear this. Loki, I know you have good deal of your father in you, and even more of your mother...” Loke sighed. “But you have my blood in you too. So, for a moment, stop being clever, and try being wise. Now out with it!” Loke emphasised his words with slapping his knee with his hand.

Loki's eyes went from his uncle's expectant gaze to Sif's, which he could only describe as 'about to boil over'. Well, the damage had been done already. Even if he was tempted to try and find one more lie to weasel himself out of it, Loki realised it was probably going to fail. The truth, then.

“I am taking Sif back to Asgard. I _am_ , so cool down!” he aimed his words to Sif. “The plan was to use the old trading point in Utgård. Helblindi thinks I am escaping with her, or what ever, I don't care. I convinced Laufey that I was going to go into Asgard as a double agent, pretending to ask asylum, but in secrecy working to steal back the Casket. And what I really planned to do...” Loki let his back lull back to lean against the beam behind him, his eyes fixed on the roof. Such a stupid thing to say out loud. He certainly didn't feel clever now. Or wise. “...was to send Sif over to her home, but stay behind. Here, in Utgård. I figured, with everyone at the Temple thinking I was over at Asgard, I could live here in secrecy and... not give a damn about anything.” Loki shrugged and fell silent.

The silence stretched and stretched, and finally Loki turned to look back at Loke and Sif. To his surprise, Sif wasn't boiling with rage. Instead, she looked... sad? It was hard to read those pale, smooth features, especially when he was used to seeing only various stages of anger etched on them. Loke, on the other hand, seemed ponderous. That was a familiar look, at least. It meant he would mull things over in his head for a good while, and Loki was free to go.

“If you don't mind, I could go the springs?” Loki asked hopefully. It had been so long since the last time.

“Hm? Sure, go ahead. And take the little ember here with you, I reckon you two have lots to talk,” Loke said with a dismissive wave of his hand. Loki would have rather gone by himself, but he knew when Loke framed his orders as friendly suggestions. So, he nudged his head at Sif.

“Come, if you want. I can show you something... nice,” Loki said, a little sheepishly. To his relief, Sif got up and followed him.

 

 

 

The steams around the springs were thick as ever. Loki inhaled deep the stinging aroma. Sif seemed a little put off by it, but Loki had gotten used to it since early age, and it had good associations.

“You will like this, Sif,” Loki encouraged her when she seemed to be hesitating. “It's been days since you have had a chance to clean up, right?” He considered making a jab about her starting to stink, but given the current situation, it was better to not try his luck.

“What is this smell?” Sif asked, but followed him anyway.

“Sulphur, from the springs. The water is warmed by the bowls of the Realm itself. This is the warmest place in Jotunheim, and that's why there's the forest and the river in Utgård,” Loki explained. He found the spring he had always liked. It was too small for most of the Jotun, practically a cramped tub for them. The temperature of the water in it wasn't uncomfortably hot, and it had a stony ledger that was comfortable to sit on. Loki begun to take off his leathers and furs, and heard a weird noise from Sif, almost like a... whine?

“What now?” Loki asked and turned to see Sif covering her eyes with one hand and keeping one between them like she was trying to block Loki from her sight. “What?”

“Don't you have any decency?” Sif huffed, still keeping her eyes covered. “I know you run around half naked but... really?”

“Is this some kind of Asgardian thing?” It was Loki's turn to huff. “I am not going into the water with my furs on, that would be stupid. Once I'm in, you can't see more of me than you see all the time.” He dropped his loincloth, waded into the water and sat down with an audible splash. “Go on, open your eyes, Sif. Nothing is going to jump at them!”

 

 

 

Behind her hand, Sif's cheeks were burning hot. It wasn't really a modesty issue. Ever since she had decided to become a warrior and fight with men, she had been teased with all manner of lewd comments and acts, and she had very early learned to not give a damn. When a man groped the front of his pants and asked her if she wanted to try his sword, she would reply with a condescending tone that it would be too small for her to get a decent grip. And so on, along those lines.

But she was still to actually find a man she liked enough to get naked with. Now that the situation like that was at hand, Sif was struck with fit of bashfulness.

“Come on, you can strip behind that rock, and when you're ready, I'll close my eyes and you can dip in,” she heard Loki saying. “Look, I didn't want to say this, but you are getting a little ripe. I can smell you over the sulphur. You are making everyone think Asgardians don't know how to keep themselves clean.”

“Alright!” Sif barked and dropped her hands. Loki was indeed chest deep in the spring, and whatever was in the water, it was murky enough to make the surface opaque. If she went in deep enough, she wouldn't be showing anything. Stiffly, Sif ducked behind the boulder and begun to strip. It became obvious that she should get into the warm water as soon as possible when the cold air hit her bare skin.

“Close your eyes, I'm coming!” Sif peeked at Loki behind the rock, and saw him obediently eyes shut, the blood red hidden in the blue. “And I will rip your manhood off if you sneak a peek,” she growled when she hopped over the slippery rocks and into the water. It was much hotter than Sif had expected, and she had to stop and gasp, and then lower herself in much slower then she would have wanted. But once she was shoulder deep, she found the stone ledger to sit on, and gave Loki the permission to open his eyes. The red appeared, and there was a teasing look on them.

“It's nice, isn't it?” Loki asked and settled back into more comfortable position, lifting his hands and crossing his fingers to rest them on his head. “I missed this...”

“It's not bad,” Sif admitted. It was more than not bad. The extreme heat was now easing into deep, relaxing warmth that eased the pain and tension of the numerous injuries and aches Sif had collected during this adventure. She also pressed her back against the stony wall and let out a sigh. “Is it not uncomfortable for you, this heat? It's almost too much for me...”

“Everyone living in Utgård gets used to it from childhood,” Loki explained, his voice more relaxed than Sif had ever heard. “And it becomes a pleasure.”

Not sure if Loki had meant to slide a double entrée there, Sif decided to give it a pass. But it didn't mean she was going to let Loki off easy.

“So, Utgård is your home, not the Temple?”

The red eyes closed again, and for a while Sif thought Loki was pretending he had fallen asleep to avoid answering. But then he drew a deep breath and nodded.

“If I can call a place home, this is it. I know I will never really _belong_ , but at least here... They don't make it so hard for me.” Loki's voice lacked the usual smooth ease, and had something ragged in it. Sif could only imagine how he felt, although... she knew something of the subject of not belonging.

“I am not angry at you for wanting to stay here, you know,” she said softly. “I just don't know why you lied to me about it. If you had just said you want to go home, I would have been less suspicious of you, than you playing this whole 'lying about lying' scheme.”

“Is that true, really?” Loki still kept his eyes closed. “You believed me and everyone in Jotunheim a monster. If I had said I'm homesick and miserable, would you have believed me, or was it easier for you to think I am a scheming trickster?” The question hung between them while Sif gaped at Loki and his perceptiveness. But before she could arrange an answer, Loki opened his eyes and gave her a smirking wink. “Also, I am a fluent liar, and lying is what I do. Don't put too much blame on yourself. I didn't trust you, so I lied.”

“Oh, so you trust me now?” Sif huffed and splashed water at Loki.

“Hey! Oh I trust you fine, trust you to be a gullible, hot-headed, violent-” Loki listed Sif's top qualities with a wide grin.

“And you are squirmy, un-trustworthy, cheating... and blue!” Sif tried to counter.

“Blue? Oh yes, so much worse that being pink. And speaking of that, you are turning more to the shade of crimson there,” Loki's grin didn't diminish, he seemed to be enjoying the spat immensely. There was no telling how far it would have gone if there hadn't been a sudden, polite “Ahem” coming from above them. They both froze in place, then slowly turned to look at the Jotun standing over the spring.

“Cousin Gjalp!” Loki exclaimed and before Sif could close her eyes or look away, he jumped out of the spring in all his blue nakedness and rushed over to the Jotun who knelt down to meet Loki eye to eye. Sif could recognise her as a woman after watching the people of Utgård for a while. Men and women all wore only loincloths and occasionally furs over their shoulders. Only children had hair, and all adults had hairless heads and faces. But women seemed to have slightly wider hips that they accentuated with brooches and beads attached to their loincloths, while men preferred necklaces and decorations on their upper bodies. In addition to the bone brooch on her loincloth, there was something near maternal in the way she brushed back Loki's hair to take a better look of his face.

“I came as soon as I heard of the avalanche. I had an inkling you might be involved,” Gjalp rumbled.

“I most certainly did not cause it!” Loki protested.

“That's how it always is with you, isn't it? You are completely innocent, while people around you just happen to wreck havoc...” Gjalp smiled, but her face grew more serious when she looked past Loki to see Sif grouching in the pool. “So, this is the Asgardian you brought with you.”

“Lady Sif,” Sif introduced herself with a somewhat stiff bow. Her education in formal manners hadn't included how to greet a Jotun while buck naked.

“I am Gjalp.” She pushed herself up. “Get dressed. Loke asked you both to come and hear what he has decided. I brought you a towel.” The woman put a folded cloth down next to Sif and turned, disappearing into the mist as she went. Sif stared after her for a while, before bursting into nervous giggle and hiding her face in her hands. It wasn't like her at all to have a hysterical fit like that, but the past days were taking their toll on her. Dumbfounded Loki stared at her, before joining in the laughter while gathering up his clothes.

“What must she think of me!” Sif gaggled and dug her fists in her eyes to wipe off the tears.

“Probably whole Utgård heard us,” Loki grinned and tied his loincloth in place. “Not that there is much left of our reputation now... But I'll close my eyes so you can climb out. They even got out the towels for your Ladyship, so we better get back.” True to his words, he closed his eyes.

“Oh, you can kiss my pink arse!” Sif snapped, but her tone was more jovial than genuinely angry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I pulled all of this out of my ass, and I really hope you like it. I didn't want Jotunheim to be a monoculture where everyone is just the same. 
> 
> If anyone knows Danish Valhalla-comics, they have had a big influence on my vision of Norse Myths. It might not be obvious, but it's there.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes Loki plays others. Sometimes Loki gets played.

“ _Show me your brave face, Loki, there's a good boy,” Loke knelt down to give his nephew a careful pat on the shoulder. The boy was all bird bones and misery, but he still pulled up his chin and blinked the tears away from his eyes. Loke made sure the clasp holding the white fur on Loki's shoulders was closed tight. No one could say Chief of Utgård sent the Prince back to his father in clothes lesser than his station. Unlike Laufey himself, who had deserted his son in the snow wrapped only in rags, and given him away like he had no worth. And now that Loki was growing up against all expectations, and proving to be skilled and talented magic user like Gjalp had suspected, Laufey sent the word that his son was to be returned to him._

_Loke straightened up with a grunt. The old burn wound in his back was still troubling him, and he cursed the Midgardians, the Aesir, and Laufey under his breath. If only Laufey wanted Loki back so he could make sure the boy was given the best education in use of magic, and his power could be used for the best of the Realm, then Loke wouldn't had any objections. But Laufey's intention was just to make sure no one else could benefit from Loki's power, and make sure Helblindi remained as his sole successor to the throne._

_Well, Loke couldn't deny that he had had half the mind to see if he could rally up enough people to support Loki's claim to the throne once Laufey croaked. But to most people Loki was a runt, and no magic would make them see past that. Internal dispute wasn't worth the risk of driving Jotunheim into deeper depression._

_Loki tugged at Loke's furs, and he looked down to give the boy a reassuring smile._

“ _This isn't the end of the world, Loki,” he said. “You are my sister's son, and you are always welcome back to Utgård. Now, your brother is waiting for you at the border. Lets get you to him.”_

_The wind blew snow and ice in vicious swirls, and trotting through it, Loke wondered if Helblindi had decided the worst time of the year for this trip just in hopes that it would kill Loki. The thought nearly made him turn around and send Laufey nothing else but a steaming pile of bear shit. But no good would come out of it. And Loki wasn't weak or fragile. If the cold could do him in, he would have died as a babe, in the ruins of the desecrated Temple._

_With that thought in mind, Loke watched the small boy climb the slope up and join with Helblindi. The wind carried away the words, but Loke knew Loki spoke with gentle, polite words. Helblindi didn't seem to say much, only grabbed his brother by the shoulder and pulled him along until they disappeared from Loke's sight. Loki was a survivor. A true Jotun. If he would survive his brother and his father, he would survive anything._

 

 

 

The atmosphere in the great hall of Utgård had changed. The domestic coming and going had turned into something more determined, more urgent. Sif didn't quite grab what it was until she saw a young Jotun woman with a spear made from a tooth of some gigantic animal. Her heart went cold when their eyes met and she recognised the grim anticipation in the Jotun warrior's eyes, much like what she had felt herself before her own first battle. _They are preparing for a war._

Loki nudged Sif's shoulder. “Don't stay behind,” he warned.

Not really caring for being alone, Sif quickened her step to keep up with Loki.

Loke was in middle of something, talking hastily with a group of older men, but when he spotted Loki and Sif coming towards him, he finished talking and gestured for the youngsters to follow him. He took them to a quiet corner and waited for Sif and Loki had sit on tall seats, their legs left swinging in the air.

“I don't think I have to tell either of you that Utgård is raising arms,” Loki begun. “Helblindi will take this as an excuse to start a fight, and Laufey has no reason to keep his thick-skulled son in check. Unless I give you both back. Which I am not doing.”

“Then you allow Sif to go back to Asgard? And... I can stay?” The wistful tone in Loki's voice when he asked that wrenched Sif's heart.

“Yes. And no.” Loke had a stern look in his eyes. “Ymir's balls, boy! Utgård's people, _my_ people have just gotten on their feet since the war. You're my blood, but that's not worth putting everyone here through a meat grinder. I gave you to Helblindi once before and you survived. You can do it again!”

Sif sensed how Loki tensed more and more by Loke's every word. He seemed to be turning inwards, like he wanted to protest, but had to swallow his words and his defiance. When Loki closed his eyes and bowed his head in compliance, Sif jumped up to stand on her chair. With Loke still sitting, they were more or less eye to eye now, and Sif did her best to stare the Jotun Chief down.

“You can't send him back there! That's cruel, they would only hurt him more and more-”

“Sif, don't...” Loki tried to pull her back down. “Loke is right, there's no other way.”

“Hel he is!” Sif tried to yank her hand free and turned back to Loke. “If you send Loki back, you have to send me too! I'm not letting him go there alone!”

“And what help would you be?” Loke spoke calmly. “You go back to the Temple, and that's it for you. If you have a death wish, I can break your neck right here, clean and painless.”

“I don't want to die! I just want to help Loki!” Sif was basically blazing with rage. “I can protect him. I can... I have to! Because none of you will do it!”

The tugging of her hand seized, and Sif could feel Loki's grip tightening around her fingers. She looked down on him, and saw the red eyes open wide, baffled.

“So young, you two...” Loke sighed. “Calm yourself and sit down, Lady Sif of Asgard. I guess I can only blame myself for getting told by a child. I wanted to see Loki's reaction, but I didn't actually think you would have so much to say. I'm not giving him back to Helblindi. Lot of good that did the first time.”

Sif and Loki could only stare at the Chief, who cracked a sheepish smile.

“Loki, I'm going to make you keep your word to this girl. I'm sending you to Asgard with her.”

 

 

 

Loki felt like his emotions had gone through a sledding obstacle track with so many ups and downs that his head was still spinning. What his heart was feeling... he didn't have time to analyse it all.

“Asgard?” He hadn't actually considered that as a real option. “Odin will just put my head on the block. I'm the son if his sworn enemy.”

“No, he wouldn't! Odin is a just King!” Sif was quick to come in her King's defence.

“She is right, actually,” Loke said before Loki could even scoff at the thought. “I have no love lost for the bastard, and I can't say that I feel bad about Laufey taking his eye. But Odin was never anything like Laufey. He won't execute a child, especially one that has helped one of his people. And you are Laufeyson, a Prince. Odin puts much weight on that kind of things.”

“But if I go... it is the same as being exiled. I can never come back, as long as Laufey or Helblindi live,” Loki said. He was younger than his brother, and there was the chance that someone might put a blade through his skull. But Loki would be an old man before he could see his homeland again.

“No doubt you are going to be there for a good while,” Loke didn't even try and deny that. “But if you can get the Casket back, I don't think anyone here is going to object to you returning.”

“The Casket?” Loki and Sif spoke in unision.

“I own Loki my life but I can't commit treason for him-”

“Trying to steal it back would certainly put me on the block-”

They realised they were speaking over each other, and after few stammering attempts to get a turn to speak, they both fell into embarrassed silence. Loke followed the exchange with great interest, and finally slapped his knees to bring the attention back to himself.

“I didn't say anything about stealing, you two trouble-makers!” He seemed to enjoy how he had tricked them both. “I need you to be on your best behaviour, Loki. Because you have to convince Odin that Jotunheim has learned its lesson, and we have been deprived of our only source of power long enough. And get him to understand that the invasion of other Realms was Laufey's idea. All his supporters are dead, Helblindi is a glorified bandit chief, and only reason no one has risen to throw them off the throne is that we've been too busy trying to re-build some kind of tolerable lives for ourselves. And perhaps because I have been whispering into select few ears that there is some hope for one Laufeyson turn out a decent man.” Loke didn't even try to not look smug about it.

“You have gone senile with age,” Loki said, a wild grin on his face. Because even if it was a mad plan, certainly doomed to fail spectacularly, it was better than hiding from Helblindi for rest of his life, or go to an open war with him. Loki would have to use all his wits and tricks to pull it off...

“What do you think?” he turned to ask Sif. The girl pursed her lips together and frowned, but when she spoke, her voice was steady.

“You have my support. I won't let anything bad happen to you in Asgard!”

“Then it's settled!” Loke exclaimed and got up. “Not that I was going to give you a choice, but it's good to know you are going along with the plan, Loki. I can't come over to Asgard to tell you to stop moping and get to work, so I just have to trust the lady here to do it for me. But lets gather up some things for you, worthy of a Prince of Jotunheim. And then it's time to whisk you over to the portal point, so we don't need to do it with Helblindi chewing on our heels.”

Loke rushed off, calling for Gjalp to come over. Loki and Sif remained seated, and Loki noticed he was still holding Sif's hand. She hadn't pulled away, despite her finger starting to turn white under his touch. Loki quickly withdrew his hand. Only then Sif pulled her hand back, rubbing it with her other hand to get the blood flowing again.

“I got so fired up, I didn't even notice the cold,” she said, and true enough, her cheeks were absolutely glowing with heat.

Loki wanted to cup her face, to even out the the temperature of their skins. She was so beautiful, so full of colours, a flame against ice.

If he was to kiss her, would he be burned worse by her heat than she by his coldness?

“Ahem.” Gjalp had appeared next to them, and startled them both. “I have some things for you to try on Loki. And if you should accept, Lady Sif, Loke would like to give you few parting gifts.”

Exchanging embarrassed smiles and short laughs, Loki and Sif slid down from their seats and followed Gjalp.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Utgård Loke and I will fight anyone and everyone who tries to say otherwise.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sif gets to work off some of that aggression she's been building up.

People of Utgård had really improved their living standards, Loki noted. The furs and leathers Gjalp held out for him to try on were better quality than in his childhood, and someone had time to carve beautiful clasps of bone and wood. It made him even more bitter about the years he had had to spend in the ruins of the Temple, surviving on scraps he could steal for himself. Perhaps Asgard wouldn't be that bad, if he managed to avoid the prison and execution block. They would certainly have luxuries to make the exile more bearable.

“You will do now, Loki,” Gjalp said approvingly and stepped back to admire the work of her hand. Loki flashed his cousin the most radiant smile he had, but when he saw the look in her eyes, it melted into a smaller, more genuine smile.

“I always knew you were destined for great things,” Gjalp said while fixing the clasp on Loki's shoulder. “Make me proud.”

“I will.” Loki had no idea if he could deliver that promise.

“That will do. Now, run along and I'll see to the lady.” The tender moment was over, and Gjalp was ordering him around like a misbehaved child.

“Why do I need to go?” Loki asked, turning to look at Sif, who he by now knew was feeling uncomfortable and unsure of herself, but tried to hide it all by standing with her head held high.

“I heard her demanding for modesty earlier, and we will respect it. Out.” Gjalp emphasised her words with pointing her finger to the doorway. Loki sent a conspirational wink at Sif on his way out.

 

 

 

“The sword Loki gave you was not his to take or pass on,” Gjalp said. She opened one of her numerous chests and pulled out another sword. “Loki gave you a blade to win your trust. I give you this as a token of the trust Utgård Loke puts on you.”

The elegantly forged sword looked like a knife in Gjalp's giant hands. But it would be heavy with responsibility and meaning, and Sif wondered if she was ready for it. Gjalp held out the sword handle first, and if Sif wanted, she could grab it and strike the Jotun woman. Obviously she wouldn't, the gesture was just a ceremonial sign of trust, but it gave Sif an idea. She took the blade and lifted it in front of her face in salute.

“I swear,” she rasped, “I shall never raise this sword against a Jotun, unless to protect Loki.”

Gjalp's brows rose in surprise, then her features softened and she let out a small sigh that might have been a quiet laugh.

“Norns have carved a curious path for you, Lady Sif. Perhaps...” Gjalp fell silent, then waved her hand to dismiss whatever thought she had in her mind. “No time for that. You need warm clothes for the rest of the trek to the old trading point, and I have few more trinkets to give you, so that your King cannot say we sent his warrior back in rags.”

Sif realised she was indeed looking ragged, her clothes torn and tattered, hair in tangles. She submitted to Gjalp combing her hair and dressing her up much like a child, covering most of her with a soft fur cape.

“White fox for Loki, red fox for you, little flame,” Gjalp spoke softly, perhaps more to herself than Sif.

Once she was satisfied with her work, she unceremoniously sent Sif out the same way as Loki. Gjalp returned to chests, rearranging them, and as Sif went, she could hear the woman humming a strange tune.

 

 

 

There was a small escort waiting for Loki and Sif. Loke was going with them, barking out last orders for his people to get ready. On his return, they would march to meet with Helblindi's troops, who had been spotted making their way down to the valley.

A great, big elk with antlers large enough to impale an adult Jotun was harnessed to pull a sledge. Loki climbed in and gestured for Sif to join in. As soon as she was in, the Jotuns got moving and sped up to a steady trot, pulling the elk with them. It's kettle-sized hooves sent snow into its wake, and Sif couldn’t risk speaking and getting a clump of snow in her mouth. Covering her face with her arms, she turned to look at Loki. He didn't seem to pay any mind to the snow flying at him, but looked at the scenery they were rushing through. His eyes weren't focused; he seemed to be just taking it all in.

 _He's saying goodbye to his home_ , Sif realised.

They came to a halt when a high wall of stone cut off their way.

“Back in the day, after much squabbling about where the trading points should be,” Loke explained while he caught his breath, “tribes came to agreement that they should be on no man's lands, between tribe territories. The one closest to Utgård is up there.” He pointed at the top of the stone wall. “There used to be stairs, but your people used the Bifrost to level them. So, you can thank the gatekeeper for the climb ahead of you, girl.”

Sif couldn't tell if the grudge in Loke's voice was real or just for the show. She decided to focus on task at hand, trying to plot out the best route up. It wasn't an impossible climb, just a long one.

“I have no time to waste here, and I'd rather be versts away when the Bifrost opens,” Loke said. “My nephew is in your custody now, Lady Sif. Make sure no one pokes a hole in him.”

“I- I will.” Sif stammered. Surely no one would slay Loki before giving her the chance to defend him. She wouldn't have to defend him on a sword point, right?

 

 

 

Loki saw the sudden insecurity in Sif's eyes, and had half a heart to call the whole thing off. If he was to die, he'd rather die in his homeland, even if it was by his own brother's hand. Not in Asgard, by people who knew nothing of him and thought even less of him than his kin. But he met Loke's eyes, and he knew the Chief wasn't going to let him back out. If Loki refused to go to Asgard, Loke would not only give him to Helblindi to avoid war, he would also surrender Sif. She didn't deserve a death like that.

Loke patted Loki on the shoulder, and their quiet exchange was over.

“Do your best, Loki,” the Chief said, and with that, turned his back and begun trotting through the snow. His men followed, none of them sparing a glance at the pair as they went. Loki sighed, and turned to Sif.

“Ladies first,” he jested, but his tone was feeble. Sif just shook her head and started pulling herself up the stony wall.

The climb was slow. Again Loki was the nimbler one and tried to go first to find Sif a secure route. At some point they found a small ledger and huddled up there to rest a moment.

“Can't the gatekeeper hear you from here?” Loki asked, not enthusiastic to climb up the rest of the way.

“He might,” Sif said. “But... I wish him to see us standing next to each other, calm and peaceful. If he saw us like this, maybe he thought you were attacking or pursuing me. He'd leave you behind, or bring you over but slay you right there... I wouldn't risk it.”

“Why are you Asgardians like that?” Loki grumbled. “Violent and rash...” For his complaining he got a jab to the ribs from Sif.

“You have energy to whine, you have energy to go on,” she said, and started climbing again.

 

 

 

They reached the top when the blue twilight started to deepen down the valley. Sif pulled herself up the last few feet and let herself fall to lay on her back. Stars above them were beginning to shine brighter against the darkening sky. She appreciated their beauty now that she was about to leave it behind.

“I hope... I hope we can return back here some day. Together.” Sif uttered out the words, trying to give some comfort to Loki, hope that his exile wasn't permanent. The response was just silence, then Loki made the strangest sound. Sif frowned, unsure if he was rejecting her sentiment with some kind of mocking, and turned to look at Loki.

Loki's feet were dangling in the air. Helblindi had him by the throat, holding him at arms length and snarling. He must have sneaked his way up and waited to ambush them while his men created a diversion by attacking Utgård.

Sif was quick to her feet, but was stopped by Helblindi sending a hail of ice at her with his free hand.

“You die later, Asgardian!” the Jotun growled and gave Loki a shook like bloodhound trying to snap its prey's neck.

Sif unsheathed her sword. It was instinct, to protect what was hers. Maybe her sword couldn't hurt Helblindi, maybe she couldn't even reach him. But there was no other way for her.

The sword in her hand flamed up.

The flame was hot, but didn't burn her; it perfectly matched the heat of Sif's rage. She didn't stop to wonder or think about it, she just let out a battle cry and charged.

“Die first, then,” Helblindi roared and dropped limp Loki to face Sif. He sent at her another attack of ice shards, but Sif swung the sword in front of her and the ice melted into rain before reaching her. Sif leaped up and came down sword first. Helblindi tired to parry with his own arm encased in ice. Sif's sword just went right through. It shattered the ice, sunk into the flesh underneath. Helblindi fell and Sif toppled down with him.

Swinging his injured arm, the Jotun managed to shake Sif and her sword off, but she wasted no time with her attack. She cut down, aiming for Helblindi's neck, and he avoided the beheading by rolling away just in time. Sif's sword slashed at his back, shoulders, across his chest, not allowing him to get on his feet, covering him in smouldering wounds. Finally she had him right on the edge of the cliff, her sword aimed at his throat.

“If you kill me, you kill the Prince of Jotunheim, girl,” Helblindi warned, his voice pained and hurried. “It would mean war!”

“I am Lady Sif, Goddess of War!” Sif declared. “Do you beg me for your life?”

“I do.” It wasn't Helblindi who spoke, but Loki. He had gotten up and approached the two carefully. “Spare my brother, Lady Sif. Jotunheim needs him... for now. And what we hope to achieve, it can't be done if you spill blood here today.”

“Runt.” Helblindi spat. “Weakling. Conspiring with Asgardian for power... Jotunheim will never kneel to you!”

“Just worry about what your men will think when they find out you left them to fight Utgård alone and come back empty-handed and burned,” Loki replied.

Sif thrust her sword a little closer at Helblindi's throat. “Start climbing. Maybe you can get to your men in time to lead the retreat.”

The red of the Jotun's eyes grew dark, and he drew his injured arm closer to his body. Then he pushed himself over the cliff's edge. Sif and Loki ran to watch him fall into the darkness, only to heard his body hit the snow somewhere below.

“Do you think he's dead?” Sif asked.

“I doubt it. We're brother's, and I know I'm hard to kill...” Loki shook his head. “Mind putting that away? The flame is a bit too hot for comfort.”

“Oh!” Sif sheathed her sword. Just to test it out, she drew it out again, but this time the blade remained ordinary steel. “Huh. I wonder if Gjalp knew when she gave me this.”

“Gjalp knows a lot of things, and likes making dangerous gambles. Now, maybe it's time you call your gatekeeper?” Loki suggested.

“Of course.” Sif took Loki's hand and looked up to the dark, star-speckled sky. “Heimdall?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading!


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